well, i had a blog. but look what happened?

I had to change my password, you know, for security purposes. too bad i forgot my password. and the password to the email it was under. Im starting where i left off with this thing. so i will go ahead and give you the latest.


Talicia and I are moving to Pomona, California. Why? Because i would like to get away. Atleast, i did. i believe that starting over somewhere in a place where you know absolutely no one, is a good way to find yourself. I lost myself in this whole mess of a year. and im not proud of that one bit. maybe some time away would be a good thing? learn how to make it on my own? make my own money, find my own job, pay my own bills, make my own friends, make my own life? It sounds intoxicating. But i would be lying if i said there werent other reasons; which i keep to myself, and even the closest of friends would never know. except maybe talicia, if she figures that one out on her own. Living In my own shit hole, second rate apartment has never sounded so tempting, its about time i spend sometime alone.

Talicia is going through alot right now, her family is in a state of war, to say the least. and there is not much i can do. except wait until i see her soon to be father in law and rip him a new asshole. literally, you think that would be a little over the top?

My gramma, she had surgery. Total knee replacement, and boy, does that shit suck. Not only is she nearly immobile, but she is in a constant state of pain, which means to her, i am a constant pain in the ass. but i can live with it, i think. it has only been two weeks since i have been allowed to leave the house, but its not her fault, so i think im doing the right thing my keeping my mouth shut and pretending im enjoying our time together.

and lastly, but definitely not least. I have a new distraction, his name is David. He used to be friends through my ex shit head adam. i met him at a show while he was dating his ex girlfriend. ironic? Im glad i came when i did, breaking up is never easy, and i hope i helped him, even if its just a little. I cant believe the things that he does for me. He is simply amazing. I cant believe how fast i decided i just had to have him. if i waited much longer, someone else would have claimed him. He has taught me alot in the little we have known eachother. He makes me want to be a better person, someone who he deserves. which is nearly impossible, but i will try everyday that he is with me. I felt bitter sweet about moving so fast, i couldnt hold myself back because something about him told me i needed him. but then again, it was soon. I know how it feels to have been replaced. I felt for his ex girlfriend, when i met her, she seemed really down to earth, very artistic. i could see why he loved her. it reminded me of how me and adam were when we were together. and i wish so badly we could have ended on good terms, and that is all that i want for david and his past girlfriend; they deserve to maintain contact, and to be able to see eachother when they would like, i think they earned that much being together for so long. I trust him. and her. i just hope that doesnt backfire. i will never stand in between a friend ship david has with anyone, not even an ex girlfriend. He is mine and i am his. and who he hangs out with during the day does not change that.

its late. and im very angry about having to do this all over again.
butgoodnight.